PROVIDA SUPPORT COMMUNITY

Marge, I will be waiting with baited breath darling.  I hope your alright.  I'll say a prayer for you.  Love ya, you know.

Ree

Im fine ..just had this pain and it didnt go away as it usually does..so I spent 7-1/2 hours in the stupid emergency room yesterday..I was SOOOO disgusted..well they did ongoing EKG and blood draws and I had to just lay there and read mags and finally someone came to turn on the tv as they had lost the controller..the doc injected my sternum..OWWW..with lidocane to see if it was arthritis as I began to think..I appraised them of my issues..did a chest xray..heard "wow" from the tech..it was just because of my arthritic spine I guess..so ..I realize now that the back doc only ordered MRI on my LUMBAR spine but I do know from before that I have the same issues in my upper spine..supposed to call MY doc today for follow up tests but Im not..they decided my heart is fine and Im not up for stress tests and stuff again. SO thats that. I got home at 9:15!!!! I had managed to get them to get me a phone as my cell wouldnt work to call Chuck and tell him at work so he'd know to go take care of dogs right after work...poor things. I had gone to Ace at 9 or so AM so they were in crates all day..poor little dogs..so no worry..just another thing..today I have lots of LO work and run billing for Ace and so busy day..I missed an hour of LO yesterday so it will affect my percent history and that means less calls..well it takes a long time to make it up..I missed 2 committs and it takes 50 to make up one..but I dont care right now. Just frustrating. I could have called and released the commits but I didnt have the phone number with me and asked if anyone had a laptop I could briefly use to get that number but no..so no recourse. Its fine tho..it was only 2. SO Im hurrying this am to eat, get the billing run and get on LO by 10. I work 10-12, and 1:10-1:40. My kitchen is a mess so thats on the docket today too. When I got home Chuck had picked a rose from every plant in the yard and had it sitting beside my place I sit int he living room..love that man. Taking in to my desk when I go to work.

Thanks for the prayers...they must have worked and yes Ree we sure have a date for Delphi..I know right were it is and have a decent guest room..its gettting there and maybe Ill manage to get those boxes and stuff out of the upstairs by then hehe..right Shelley..and I have a nice soaking tub up there..it thats your thing..you could soak and play SIms..hehe

Worst thing was I had only had my oatmeal and at 2:45 they brought me some ice water..I was all wired up and couldnt even go potty..ony when I went to xray..basically left alone most of the time. They just came in to draw blood every 3 hours or so to test some enzyme that your heart muscle puts out if there is a lack of O2. apparantly your heart muscle is different than any other muscle in your body and a heart attack is really lack of oxygen..so when there is an impairment like a blockage it puts out this enzyme..so thats why I was forced to stay that long. But I am swelled up like a ballon..even my rings are tight..and they nearly fall off normally..so lots of water today..I have my commode in the 'office" LOL.

I love you guys so much for caring about me and just because I like you

Have a great day and I will try and be good today..guys something HAS to happen here and I know it is up to me but I need God to click the switch for me cause I am almost out of energy.

By the way we are having a conference available for the Food Lovers plan tomorrow and I signed up for it..I want to know why its a Provida program if Provida has 6WBMO too..Michael isnt anyway in sight. SOOO I want those calls but it has a LOT of upsells I guess and agents questions (we can ask some online ahead of time fot the townhall meeting so I am going to read the scripts and see if there is anbything there interesting.

Hope all is well with all of you..Shelley I know you are excited about this week end..I envy you cause I know you are gong to enjoy it SOOOO much..can't wait to hear all. SO I guess my message of the day is cherish every moment..these people in the news that have died are really just people..just in the news because they are celebs..those things are happening everyday to people everywhere..I so love life..bad as it can be..lets do this guys..our lives DO depend on it. Down the road if not now..I have to be around to at least have met you all right?

Off I go..ace billing..everyones had time to punch in..

love BQ

I do have to get this morning tho guys..

Well, good morning, all you rays of sunshine!

I have to say that yesterday was just one of those days where I had very few words to say.  I was all talked out.  This is why I didn't get back on to post.  I was up late last night because I was waiting for Steven to call... which he didn't.  I tried calling him, but it rang straight to voice mail, which is usually an indication that his phone is off.  So I worried.  Not a good night's sleep, to say the least.  When I finally did get to sleep, I had a bad dream.  He called this morning at 6:00 a.m. telling me he had misplaced his phone charger and the phone went dead and he didn't know it until this morning when he got up.  Then he went down to his car to look for his charger and there it was!  He had it over the past weekend in case he would need it.  So he put the phone on the charger and called me this morning while I was in the tub.  Thankfully I had the phone with me.  It was just a relief to hear from him. 

So, while I was up late last night, I came here and read a bit until my eyes got tired... but I really didn't feel like posting.  Sometimes I just have those kinds of days.  I'm all verbally depleted.  LOL! 

Today, the office is supposed to get back to "normal"... whatever that is.  I'm supposed to be getting some stuff done for my doc that I haven't been able to do all week because of having to work another doc's patients.  So hopefully, I can make some headway in that department... it I can't... oh well... I'm not going to stress over it... stress kills, right?

I got on the scales this morning and was surprised by the 2.4 pound weight loss between yesterday and today.  So surprised, in fact, that I had to get back on at least 2 more times just to be sure the scales weren't going wacky on me!  LOL!  It's so nice to not see them say "274.anything" anymore.  I just hope that it doesn't fluctuate back up like my body is accustomed to doing.  But I won't fret.  I know I'm POP... the weight will eventually come off.  TOM must be getting ready to leave town for a few weeks, so I'm dropping some water weight. 

Ree,
I'm glad those endorphins finally decided to come back to you.  I know that's the difference between loving and hating the exercise aspect of any weight loss plan.  I so wanted to get up early this morning and walk, but being up so late last night prevented me from doing that, because when I finally got to sleep and when the alarm went off early, I didn't want to get up until the last possible minute.  So I'm going to try to go and walk on my lunch hour.  If I can't, then I'll definitely have to get on the treadmill tonight.  I really do notice a difference when I do my cardio.  And I'm starting to feel my ab muscles toning up now because of all of the crunches that I'm doing on The Bean.  I'm up to 150 per day now.  I really start to feel the "burn" at about 110.  LOL!  When those start to get easy, I'll up it by about another 25-50 crunches.  My belly is the biggest part of me... and I'm diligently working hard at getting it toned and flat again.  I like the fact that the seatbelt in my car is easier to fasten than it was 8 and a half weeks ago.  So you keep on keepin' on and keep that enthusiasm going!  It IS contagious!  We all just have to get close enough to "catch" it.  Right Marge? 

Marge,
I'm glad that everything checked out OK.  I can't begin to tell you how much I was relieved when I came on here last night to read that you did, indeed, go and get checked out.  I know it was a long drawn-out ordeal... and the $$ is stressful enough... but in the case of the heart, it's always better to be safe than sorry.  Three things you don't mess with when it comes to your body:  Your liver, your heart and your brain.  Remember that!  Those are three things that you cannot live without... also your kidneys... although people have been living on one kidney and dialysis and such... but there are really no such cures for the other three.  So, your little "scare" should get you back on track with this plan.  I know it's stuff like that which scares me straight.  Fortunately for me, I can learn from other peoples' nightmares... and when I start to see signs and symptoms in myself of what those other people have gone through... then I really have to stop and think about what I did to get as fat as I did and ask myself if it was really worth it?  I know that when I get to goal... I'm gonna KNOW that I worked hard for it.  And you will too... as will Ree, Rachel, Linda, Mary and Melanie.  We just need to stick together and encourage one another... post often for accountability and just to the absolute best that we can do.  I think Chuck is a doll for picking the roses for you.  That was so incredibly sweet of him!  When I read that last night, I had tears welling up in my eyes.  He really does try, doesn't he?  Anyway... I'm relieved that all is well in the ticker department! 

Melanie,
How are you today, my dear... did you get that ticker to work for you?  How are ya POPin?  Check in when you get a minute or two...

Well, I need to hit the papers here in my desk.  They keep piling up and piling up and soon they will be turning the phones on and I'll need to get busy.  I hope you all have great and wonderful Wednesdays. 

Shelley

Marge, thank God your alright!!!  I was really worried about you.  I know the ER is no fun, but hey, you gotta be careful with your body.  So, now you can go on which is a good thing.  We both have had enough of hospitals, and health issue right?  On ward and up from here.

Shelley, I know what you mean about not wanting to talk.  I'm the quieter one of this group I think, and I get like that alot.  I could go for days without talking, but then when I do the flood gates are open!!  Anyway I made my little endorphine pendant and he looks cute.  So, I will start wearing him, maybe not to the gym cause I don't want to hang myself, but when I'm not working out.  Boy am I ever sore today, my legs are so stiff, but it's good, that means I'm working my mucsles out.  Hey Shell, question about the bean, sometimes I get absent minded, and I forget how to do the bean.  I lost the CD somewhere around here so I can watch them to see what there doing.  When you rock, are you supposed to lift your head up, like a crunch?  Cause that's what I'm doing and I don't feel a thing.  I think I'm supposed to be only rocking without the lift, but not sure.  Can you let me know please?  I miss doing the bean, I really get addicted to it when I feel it working.  How something simple makes me so happy I'll never know.  But I suppose that's good too.

Ok the rest of you.  I know your reading, so hi, and I hope your haveing a good day too.  Oh, and Mary, HAPPY CANADA DAY!!!

Aloha Ree

Hello girls

Today is a much better day. MIL went back to her home for a few days and let me tell you, the difference!! Wow, She really isn’t a horrible woman but sh3e is like ex lax, only good in small doses. Heheh. Ok, another topic. Feeling better and it was great to get up this morning and just be by myself , really great. Today is my bd so I ordered my cake (nope, will not eat it but the kids want it) Don’t know if MIL will be back tonight because she has to have help right now because she had a major operation last month

I am still reading your posts and give me some time and I will start to respond more regular. Just have been depressed and way out of control on all counts and when I am like that, I get scarce int alking to anyone. But I am feeling better little by little.

Rachel

  Happy birthday, Rachel!  I hope you had a very special day!  Glad you got some alone time for yourself... I know what a stressful time it is to have to care for a parent, let alone an in-law parent.  But you got a reprieve for your birthday... YAY!  Hang in there, kiddo!  You'll be a POPin' steam engine in no time! 

Last night, I thought I would spend some time getting ready for my camping trip, but ended up doing nothing but shopping.  And now that I did that... I'm thinking of everything that I forgot and I already spent too much money!  Most of that was for a new tent.  There was just no way that I would have been able to go camping one more time in that little bitty tent that we had.  I need room to store stuff and still be able to walk around in the tent comfortably should it rain or something.  So I need eggs.  I forgot them.  LOL!  And then Steven was telling me about everything that HE was bringing.  Well, let's just say that Deb and Wayne will be eating well!  LOL!  Steven said that he couldn't see it being the 4th of July without a watermelon, so that's what he is bringing.  It's a small one... but I probably won't be partaking of it.  But if given the choice between that and S'mores... well I would choose the watermelon... but seriously don't want either one.  I am not willing to cheat.  I am completely prepared for POP eating.  Lots of fresh veggies... lean meats... and Whatever I don't eat... Steven will.  So I will do a brunt of my packing when I get off... which I'm going to try and get off early today if Dan will allow me to.  Steven is seriously trying to come out today instead of waiting for tomorrow.  He really sounds excited about coming and that really warms my heart.  So here we go! 

Ree,
That little endorphin pendant sounds cute and just like the motivation you need to keep going!  I'm very proud of how far you've come in such a short time!  You are on your way to becoming a brand-new woman!  KEEP IT UP!  That pool sounds a bit pricey, but if you and Suzy have it worked out, then GREAT!  I truly love a good swim... and I don't get to do it enough... so enjoy it while you can!  I was told yesterday that I looked smaller!  I got a good look at my butt in the mirror and it was looking rounded and toned... I was like, "Whose butt is that?"  LOL!  Then I had to laugh and say... "Oh, it's MINE!"  LOL!  Must be that walking!  I'm gonna get enough cardio just setting up camp this evening!  I plan to take my laptop... so I'll be checking in from time to time... this forum is a big part of my accountability and success with this plan!  So I'll be seeing ya!

Marge,
Well how are you today?  I got up extra early this morning... again, planning to get some stuff packed for the trip but only got the apple-berry salsa made for a retirement party that we're having at work.  I suppose I could make that OP if it didn't have the apple jelly in it.  But I forgot about making a little dish just for me without it.  That's OK... I have to be in the mood for stuff like that.  It's ready to go though.  As I mentioned earlier... Steven is planning to be here tonight.  So I'll be packing up the car and going out to unload it, and coming back to get him when he arrives at my house.  He's worried that what he wants to bring to the site won't fit in my car.  I didn't have the heart to tell him that I planned to be there with the tent set up already before he even hits Decatur!  LOL!  I might wait to set up the tent until he gets here... but then again, I am afraid that if I do that, it will be too dark when he gets here... and it's a new tent and I don't want him to have to be helping me to put it up in the dark.  So I'll go pitch it and have Deb and Wayne help me.  It should be that difficult, but it is new... and it's bigger... so it may need a couple more hands at least to put it up.  I'm getting excited... can you tell?  Still have to get through work though.  I have a busy morning with pre-screens... but then they close the office and lock the doors at noon for Mary's retirement party.  Then I may see if he'll let me go.  I really need to get this stuff done, but it's not stuff that I can do ahead of time.  I'm getting mental checklists in my head and I truly hope that I don't forget anything.  But thankfully, I'll be close enough to home to be able to come back and get it if I need it.  So I hope you plan to have a great day!  May it be as POP as it can be!  Remember that pain that you had and how much it scared you... and let that be the wind in your sails that keeps you going on this plan!  I want to see your enthusiasm rise up like Ree's has... and mine... and you can have that too!  Have a super day!

Well, I gotsta go get in the shower.  This day ain't gonna get started on its own!  (Well, I guess it will... but it'll do it without me if I'm not careful!  LOL)  Have a great last day of the week! 

Shelley

Well this is SO slow this morning I wont mess around with color. Just wanted to checkin. These dogs are making me crazy this am///just want to play and lick me and eachother incessantly..not bad stuff..Im just in a mood I guess..I have to go to the store AGAIN to do backtags and that means I will probably miss going to the center. Thats the week shot..makes me mad..I pay to go there and NEED to work out..I may have time to run in and at least get in the pool..it is so theraputic for my body..but it takes over 2 hrs to do floor and pool and shower so I may have to just work out in the pool ..maybe I'll do that..have to be home by 3 to feed dogs and LO 4-5. SOOO, thats my day. Its overcast and that is fine with me..its cool and I love that..when the sun comes out it will steam some and be in hte 70's so I am enjoying the cool 60's.

Shelley I am excited just thinking about you and Steve and your fun week-end..beats working LO all day Sat as Im gong to do...05 cent bonus all day I think..thats per minute so can't pass that up..be hard to whack that mole and get the committs tho. Anyway enjoy your week end a lot..and congrats on that butt hehe. Mine? Cant find it. Its there somewhere I know. "Come out come out wherever you are" LOL Hey maybe you can make Ree a copy of the cd I sent you for the bean I gave you..so she can see the proper way to use it..didnt I give yo a video too? Both would help her a lot and boy when someone has the gumption to work out we need to contribute eh?

 "Those who want to be successful, will find a way, those that don't, will find an excuse!"

I bought the "Does this clutter make my butt look fat" on Amazon for $6.95..I'll let you know....I want to take a month and drive the Lincoln Highway..in the Jeep. eat at Diners and Motels.. when I was a kid my family was air force and we traveled ALL the time. we stayed on Rte 66 and The Lincoln. crossed this country back and forth..so Im going to start planning..I already told Chuck we are going to call Tom oh his promise to Chuck when he hired him that he could have 2 weeks pd vacation and could have a third paid..I have to save to make up his two checks..thats our mtg and most everything else. ..so maybe a couple years..still its fun to dream..I want to do that most every year after that so I HAVE to find a way to make up one months pay of his..it will be hard but SOOOO worth it. Dreams. Good for him tho..he gets so tired and has 7 years to work yet..then we will probably live day to day so maybe we can utilize the4se last working years to "live". Should try to save every dime to live on but guess what..I could die tomorrow and we will never have enough really. SOOO I want to live now..not big $$, that kind of trip can be lots of camping and buy groceries at little stores, make it a wandering lazy trip with no daily goals of miles or time..just make it back for his job in time..maybe tow the boat or the ATV and a dirt bike..probably not just meander..well thats how I feel today..make my bed Ree and Mary..hehe

Mornin whomever is reading this this morning..its cloudy but gong to be sunny soon. Cool and I love that but up into the low 70's later..

I was pop until about 9:30 when I ate a snack that was not op..wont say but it wasnt desert stuff..just a left over..so confession time. Like Shelley said accountability!!! On I go..so I have a secondary goal..20lbs by August 14th and 50 by New Years 2010. Thats all the regain..THEN on to goal of 170. I will ask no more than that. Thats 80lbs.,

SO guess not much to say..work on boat today install Retas printer and clean and cook..we're going to work on the boat a little.

SO have a great day guys..enjoy this week end.

Marge

Good morning Marge.  I was at the dentist yesterday, and when I got home I started playing the Sims3, I shouldn't have done that before posting here because then I lost all track of time.  I was desinging a new house.  You get to build from the ground up like an architechet(?)  And then just when I was going to bed I went in to say goodnight to Coll, and we got into a dicussion about the Sims3, I was laughing so hard my stomache hurt, and I couldn't catch my breath.  I'm off to the gym in a few Suzie is coming to get me.  I'm still really sore from Monday so not sure how far I will get today.  But I'm planning on taking it slow.  Guess what?  I'm going fishing next Saturday with Donna.  It's here birthday and this guy who is doing some work on her house has a boat and says he will take her and some friends out to fish.  I'm really excited.  When Tom and I were first married he bought me a fishing pole, I used it once, and all I caught was clam!!!!  Go figure that one I didn't know you could catch clams like that.  It's hot here today, but nice, it's breezy outside.  Not too much to say right now.  But I wanted to check in.  I guess Shell has left already.  Well, I will try to get back later on.

Aloha

Ree

GOD BLESS AMERICA

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY

HERES TO FREEDOM

Mornin Ree and any others who checkin. I have to work LO 10-12 and 1-3. I hate workng Saturdays but we get a .05 cent bonus today so thats .30 a minute. Well it's my business so I have to get tough with my employee LOL

We started the boat. Took all the cleats, lights, windshield and ALL the rusty bolts out of it. I should say HE did LOL. I did get up on a chair and help get the windshield off. We will get steel bolts to replace the old ones, strip the old liner out of it, then clean it and begin to polish it. I am going to repaint the accent area and make cushions. Might buy a bimini top if we decide we may ust it more..then we are painging the trailer and transfering the old vintage fenders for looks..still cannot find much of any info on this one..pretty scarce.

Ree sounds like fun going fishing..havent gone in many many years now. Maxine and I used to fish on the lake but havent in a long time now. Maybe I'll ask her if she'd like ot go this summer..

SO its clouding up but no rain predicted..74 and thats fine for me. I'll be in and out anyway.

I made our hobo dinners last night. Gr chuck with seasoning, carrots, onions, and potato in DH fold it up and baked in the NuWave for 30 mins, then turned over and another hour..I had a baked potato in for me as I forgot to put one in my foil dinner...it was all SOOOO good. i wish I could get back op better..was a little low on water yesterday as I forgot at first to take it to the barn with me and just oculdnt make myself walk back ..I find without the cane I give out sooner. But oh well.

SO all I have to get off and prepare to work in a few..i pray you all have a safe and fun day..

Land of the free

Home of the Brave

BQ

Good morning, and HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY!

I'm checkin' in!  It's been nice and relaxing.  Steven has enjoyed himself and Deb and Wayne really like him. 

I have been OP with the exception of supper on Thursday evening... it was two hours LATE!  I had a salad from McD's.  Steve made me eat because I was grumpy.  LOL!  (He's sitting here and telling everyone that I'm a good story-teller.)  LOL! 

But we have had good weather up until this morning... then we had nice garden variety showers.  Nothing heavy... no wind.  Just wet.

The tent stayed dry for the most part.  Leaked around where the little buttons are that hold your windows down... but stayed dry for the most part due to my water-proofing it. 

It's been nice and relaxing.  And I'm feeling pretty proud about my staying OP because of the fact that they are eating traditional cook-out stuff that I really REALLY like.  I fed THEM chicken for lunch.  AND SMOOTHIES!  That went over really well... until the guys complained of having to potty every hour through the night!  They blamed it on the smoothies.  I was fine.  Deb was fine.  I think they were just full of it.  LOL! 

So that's it for now.  We're just waiting for the grass to dry... actually sitting here watching it as a matter of fact.  I bought a new game that is going to be fun to play... once the freakin' grass dries!  LOL! 

Fun times here!  Have a great day!  I know I am.
Shelley

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY !!

I can't believe it's the fourth already!!!  This year is going by so quickly.  Anyway I hope everyone has a wonderful day.  Not sure what we are going to do.  We didn't buy fireworks this year because it's just me and Tom.  We're going over to my Mom's but they don't allow fireworks in San Francisco, only where I live.  Anyway, the sun is out and I'm feeling really good, ya wanna know why?  Because yesterday at the gym I walked for 30 minutes!!!  Yes I did.  The funny thing about that is my left leg was really sore, actually the mucsles were sore, and I didn't think I could do more then 15 minutes, but I doubled it.  How do you like that huh?  I am sore this morning, but not too bad.  A little low on the water yesterday and this morning.  I woke up late this morning, and I haven't even eaten yet.  And yes fishing sounds wonderful to me.  We will be going out from Sausalito(?) and then going out on the Bay.  I have never been fishing on the Bay and I'm so excited!!  Then on the 14th we are going to the DeYoung museam to see the King Tut exihbit.  I think you guys know how much I love ancient Egypt, well, we are going to see the show.  I saw the first one 30 years ago when I was 21.  They said it was 30 years to the month.  I can't believe I was ever that young!!!  Ha ha.  Donna's mother will be out here from New Jersy for two weeks, and that's who I'm going fishing with, Donna and her family, and then to the exhibit, Tom will join us for that.  I can't explain what happens when I see ancient Egyptian artifacts, I feel like I'm transported to another time, and I get filled with wounder.  And I long to talk to the people, smell the land, and eat there food, I want to be a part of the whole thing, I feel so alive, and mesmerized by the whole thing.  I feel it all with every fiber of my being.  I have many books about it, and have read almost every single one of them.  I truly would love to go there, but the world is too crule now, to venture out that way.  Why do poeple mess things up all the time?  Dreams are taken away without a thought.  Oh well, I have my books and now I will see the artifactys in person.  So, that makes me happy.  I'm sorry I get carried away.  Anyway, Marge I hope your day is happy and healthy even if you have to work.  I would love to go fishing with you on your boat!!!  Shelley, I'm not a camper, but I hope you have a wonderful time.  Which I know you will.  I'm fighting the urge for one of the 4th traditional foods, it's chicken, but not the kind we can have, if you know what I mean?  I know we will watch the Boston Pops tonight, it's sad they only do an hour now.  They used to go for at least two hours I think.  Oh well, things change.

Ok, love you guys.

Ree

morning losers

well, today is Sunday here and I am proud to say, I made it through pop thus far. And we even had allt he fam here with great dishes. Then, everyone left except for Rebecca and I have a huge problem with wanting to binge when nobody is there so fought that urge and won. So, slowly getting my edge back. Not easy but to have the control back is great. For me, I am a terrible binging of the worse kind. To be honest, in jus two weeks or so, I gained 20 pounds! No kidding. So getting back in control is imperitive for me right now. I am feeling much better, better mood, better feeling. So, let's get in Shelley's wagona nd hitch um up!

Rachel

SOOOOO, my busy little bees have been here while I worked hehe. HELLOOO my dear friends.

Shelley glad to see you check in..and how well you are doing on your campout...I know its hard but when you are in the groove (can I even remember that feeling? I'm trying cause I WANT IT BACK) anyway I do remember it NOT being agonizingly difficult. I do pray it is now that way for your and that the rest of us on just a little behind you in that state of mind. I know you are really enjoying Steves visit and it must be great fun. I remember a 4th we camped up on the Rifle River, Greg was 2 and we'd canoed all day. Chuck had been drinking with the guys and I stayed int he tent with Greg to get him to sleep..well, we were camped on a lower level and there was a camping area above us..they set of fireworks and it began to fall on the tent..the tent wa an old cabin tent of his folks and even tho we'd sprayed it it was old canvas and I was SO afraid it would catch on fire..they would land and sizzle and go out..on the roof..whew! I was NOT a happy camper if you know what I mean. LOL Anyway have fun. Hi Steve.

Rachael..boy oh boy was I glad to see you. I know you've had a lot on your plate lately and have been struggling too. You are so resiliant and I know you'll get it back. See, you even survived the family get together..AND being there with just Rebecca..so you can do this Rach. You've been our shining example for so long..so we WiLL make this work ...just have to do it every "moment" and move to the next "moment" easier said than done..well we have to. You are the youngest and think about this. You will have the longest to benefit from this plan. So as you told me do my best..well I havent been..I could lie and say I'm trying..that IS true most of the time but I too have a problem with not taking a bite but binging..seems to me that kind of "disability" would actually be something that we could use FOR ourselves..it we have that all or nothing "feeling" when we binge just MAYBE that very quirk in our personality COULD be used for our good..maybe that's what "allowed" us to succeed so well the first and for you the second time around. Let's LOOK for that again..somehow. Keep well.

Linda havent seen too much of you lately but know you'll pop up soon. Hope you're having a nice long week-end and managing popness the best you can. Talk to you when I catch you  on.

Mary, know you'll just jump back on when you can. Hang in there.

Melani..hope you're getting into a groove..give us a shout when you can.

Me Im tired tho I did make about $70 in 4 hours so not too bad. Then to the barn where Chuck was messing with the boat trailer..we had burgers off the grill...SOOOO good..of course I didn't have a bun like DH but it was good anyway..had some applesauce with a can of crushed pinapple mixed in..very tasty..now just wiaitng for it all to settle before I can go to bed..not dark yet so fireworks havent started yet..just osme noise..they have a big parade and even a military fly over in Gregory. The old ball flats there have vendors and abig BBQ and then fireworks I think about 9 tonight..we used to be able to see them from here upstairs..now the trees are too big. We also used to (Before Greg) ride the bike down there and we could get out without trouble like the cars that had to wait in such long lines to get home..emily and the other kids in Troys family rode in a wagon in the parade..she was geeked..they stopped by briefly. Msoquitos are absolutely viscious for some reason and we even had to give up our stroll around the yard. SO came in for the day..the sun is low and shining on the tall trees on the creek and the pines while the hosue is in total shade..day is done.

BQ

Well Ree at least you are getting stronger and stronger and isnt health what we are striving for here? I am very impressed with your progress and just know you are on your way now.

Good morning girls..well I survived the 4th just fine..we did nothing..other than I worked 4 hrs and Chuck worked on the boat some..its beautiful this morning as usual here..light mist rising off the marsh and the sun is coming up over the pines..just a minute now..slight chance of storms the national says but local says nothing so I hope not..have LO all day.

Shelley hope you guys are spared any heavy weather and you can continue your camping week end. savor every moment as I know you will..stay safe.

So I was just checking in to "keep the thread alive" like "keep the love alive"..and I NEED TO GET ON PLAN.

Girls I have to tell ya..I have been feeling unwell lately..and I have to say it is the weight..and the mental effect it has too..I ws thinking a lot yesterday. When I was 40lbs lighter I made a date to dance with DH our anniversery which is the 27th of this month..I couldnt wait to see how I "fit" on the seat of the bike..I couldnt wait to ride my little bike..and to go sailing on the bosses boat being able to once more just step in and out without self consciounsesness of having someone help me..and what it was like to breath easily, NOT hear my blood pressure in my ears in bed..not have my boobs smushing between my arms when I sleep on my side..not have to lift and roll in bed but able to just roll over..

I'm being graphic here..I have to get it back..at LEAST to where I was. SO I pray I can get re-organized..it is that that has diminished..have the food prepared and looking ahead enough to stay that way.

THAT is my resolve somehow. HELP ME LORD> I have to trust in Him now..like all things in life it is beyond my control..I know before it was the mindset and didnt HE do that for me before? I have to believe that 'cause it just "happened" and I thought I was going to die. Then all the surgery AFTER I had lost hte weight..SO what's THAT about. I lose, I finally have my back and hip done and I GAIN IT BACK. THAT IS STUPID. YES I USED THAT WORD AND I'm sorry if it offends others of you that have regained. There are as many reasons for htat as there are for losing and I judge none of you..this is just about ME. It was STUPID of me to let that happen when I am older and my health is SO at risk. So please dont let my comments hurt you..I just know I have to do this and I will do this..somehow. I love you all

Rachael take care. I just saw on weather channel that Shanghi is under thunderstorm and flood alerts..stay safe. Thinking of you.

My Dearest Marge,

I think of any one here I understand your plight the most only because I have followed in your foot steps.  We are kindred spirits.  I can't talk for you, but with me, I have felt that it was stupid, why couldn't I just do it like before?  Why?  And then when I started going to the gym, and getting so sick because my blood sugar would go way down.  I have to tell ya, right now, my focus is on getting my body strong, yes, I still watch my food, but if I mess up I don't beat myself up.  What I think, and this may be so wrong for anyone but me, but I think, if my body is craving something, then my body needs it, maybe not for weight loss, but to heal, so I have it.  Of course I'm not talking about ick.  Like some days I really really crave meat, t-bones in particular, so I have one, with lots of veggies, and a potatoe.  I feel the difference right away, my energy comes back and I'm not a cumpy mess.  In the summer I crave figs, fresh figs, they are my favorite, so I bought two little baskets, and some goat cheese.  I can't tell you how good that has made me feel.  Food is not the enemy, we have to stop thinking of it that way.  We need it to sustain our bodies.  We need it to keep our brains healthy, and our brains need oil sometimes.  So, what I'm saying, is follow the plan, but if your body says, I NEED MEAT!!  Then have it.  Marge since I have been thinking like this I no longer get sick after working out.  I believe it's because I'm giving my body what it needs.  I have learned a long time ago to listen to my body.  Of course like I said, that does not include ick, because my body or mind is always saying, ooooh, I want that, but we know that's not what we need.  We're smart women, we know what our bodies need.  I have to go, but I will write you an e-mail just as soon as we get home if it's early enough.

Love ya

Ree

Good evening, friends...

I'm back home... I have been home since around noon, but as usual when Steven goes home, I get in a bit of a depressed funk for a bit after he leaves.  Understandable.  But I have to tell you of a wonderful breakthrough that has helped me to get through it all... and Steven was a HUGE part of helping me through it! 

We got up a bit later this morning.  Steven told me that he could have gotten up around 5 or 6 this morning, but nobody else was up and he felt that I wanted and needed to sleep later, so he didn't wake me.  He just laid on the bed with me and made himself fall back to sleep.  So we get up around 8 and I'm looking at how wet the tent is and dreading taking it down as wet as it was.  I go into Deb and Wayne's camper where we had breakfast every morning, and bless her heart, Deb had my oats and boiled eggs already fixed.  She was cooking breakfast for her and the men and all I had to do was put my cup of water in the microwave for my coffee.  Then we went outside and strategized about how we were going to break camp.  Steven had already taken the fly off of the tent and we laid it over the picnic table.  There was a beautiful breeze blowing that actually dried the fly AND the tent once I dried the outside of it off with a towel.  So taking it down was a bit easier than we thought that it would be. 

We left camp and got home just before noon and immediately put the wet towels in the wash with the damp sheets that were wet from the water on the floor of the tent that seeped in under the mattress.  I also washed the dirty clothes of Steven's so he would not have any extra dirty laundry to do once he got home.  (Wasn't that nice of me?)

But the biggest thing in my mind when I neared home was the fact that I had missed my MMS.  All I wanted to do was to go out for the final meal with Steven before he had to go home.  I had it all planned out in my head.  I was going to wait for the washer to finish, throw the clothes in the dryer and while they dried, we could go out for lunch.  I kept asking Steven if he was hungry.  He kept telling me that he was OK, but that he would eat one of my POP meals to keep him satisfied.  He wasn't the least bit interested in going out.  AND... he didn't want ME going out either.  He was thinking that I had done too good a job over the weekend to mess things up now.  I didn't actually mention to him anything about my desire to want to go out, but his insistence on not wanting anything was what got me to thinking that we weren't going out.  So I got up and reluctantly busied myself with unloading the cooler and the picnic basket with all of my dried goods.  In the process of doing that, I found about 3 burgers that they had grilled and stuck in my cooler.  So I reheated those for Steven... he was OK with the fact that there wasn't any bread.  He just put mustard on them and I gave him some leftover tomato salad that I had prepared and drizzled some balsamic vinegar with Splenda of it for him and gave him a glass of cold water.  He was very satisfied.  I ate a small bowl of the tomato salad while I cooked some oats and a couple of boiled eggs.  I know that it wasn't a traditional "lunch" per se, but it beat what I was THINKING of having, which would have turned out to not be POP at all.

Now, I will confess that I was not COMPLETELY perfect yesterday, but I did REALLY well.  It WAS a holiday after all, right?  But because of the rain that occurred all the live-long day yesterday... yes, it was steady ALL day long... it kept coming down and coming down... but around 7:00, it finally stopped.  And miraculously, the guys got a nice fire going in the pit.  Considering the pit was under a few inches of water, it was quite a feat for them to get one going.  I offered to cook supper last night.  Since Deb didn't have anything thawed, she thought that was a great idea!  I had a HUGE slab of a thick cut top sirloin steak and two beautiful butterfly pork loin chops.  I cut the steak into thirds (very generous portions still), seasoned everything with no-salt seasonings... pepper, garlic powder, onion powder... and they got put on the grill for the guys to cook.  I wrapped 3 GIGANTIC potatoes in foil and dropped them in the hot coals of the fire.  I also wrapped up some cobs of corn that I cut in half and put those in the coals too.  On the stove in the camper, I sauteed some colorful red, yellow and orange peppers with some onions and mushrooms until they were tender.  I also cooked some asparagus with garlic powder and pepper.  We had tomato salad made with some huge garden tomatoes that were so sweet and some sliced onions and sliced cucumbers.  I sprinkled basil over the entire mixture and left it up to each individual to put the balsamic on the mix if they wanted it.  Everyone LOVED everything!  They all stuffed themselves!  I had one little bite of Steven's steak at his insistence... but then I had a bit more than a proper portion of the chop... I should have just cut it in half, but I ended up eating the whole thing.  And I couldn't resist one of those little cobs of corn which was as sweet as candy.  I know I could have done MUCH worse seeing as how the 4th of July is one of my favorite holidays.  The ICK that I used to eat on this holiday would have been enough to bloat me up like a toad.  But I was good.  I felt good about myself for having been good.  But for my PM snack, I didn't have the usual smoothie... I had 2 S'mores instead.  And, yes, TWO is better than what I would have had in the past.  I do not feel guilty at all... it was my favorite holiday and I could have definitely done MUCH worse.  If I have no losses for the entire weekend, then I'll take that... I feel as if I overcame a HUGE obstacle just by coming home and fighting that battle of wanting to go out really bad. 

You see, I am an emotional eater.  In the past, when Steven would go home, I would either NOT eat... or I would eat everything in site.  After eating my make-shift lunch and seeing Steven off... I went upstairs and took a long nap... when I awoke, it was time for my MAS... I had it... and now I'm just waiting for supper.  That will happen in about an hour... simply because I was a late riser this morning.  Thank You, Jesus, for helping me to stay on the straight and narrow this weekend!  I do not know what my weight is because I did not take my scales with me... which was probably a good idea.  But I have been going to the bathroom A LOT!  But last night, my ankles were swollen A LOT because of the fact that we were just sitting in the camper all day.  I didn't have a chance to put my feet up while sitting... and of course, the rain prevented any getting up and moving around except for going back and forth between the camper and the bath house.  LOL! 

So I'm fine! 

Rachel,
Come on!  Hitch up yer wagon and get on in the wagon train!  Drive your wagon right up along side me and we'll ALL get to goal!  The wagon trail is wide enough for all of us to drive our wagons side-by-side!  The first day is the worst... once you get that first day down, little-by-little, you'll get to where before long, you'll have weeks and even months of POPness under your belt.  One day at a time, sweetie!  You'll get there!  GOOD FOR YOU for resisting the binge eating while being "unsupervised" by the observant eyes.  I'm much better with that, but I feel your pain when you speak of it... because I, too, used to binge eat whenever nobody was looking.  And like Marge, I think my mentality of it being "all or nothing" didn't help in that matter.  Now, it's ALL POP or not at all... and thank God, I haven't fallen off plan to the point where I thought that I should just sabatoge the entire day just from one little slip.  So, you are doing well!  Keep it up!  Treat each day as if it were your first and before long, you'll be at goal! 

Melanie,
I hope you get a chance to check in really soon!  Don't let the holiday get you down.  Some people really have a hard time... especially if they're just starting out on this plan... and then, BLAM... there's a holiday that you have to plan for.  If you were able to stick with the plan over the holiday, SUPER!  But if you weren't... don't be discouraged... just start back again with the next meal and POP yourself to goal!  So, dear, please check in... we do miss you!

Ree,
Your little outting that you have planned coming up sounds great!  I remember fishing when I was a little girl.  I never caught anything bigger than about 3 inches long.  Those fish usually got cut up and used for bait.  Fishing isn't really my thing though... I would have to have Steven bait my hook because I can't stant handling the worms... and if I were to catch anything, he would have to take it off... because I can't touch the live fish either... creeps me out.  LOL!  I know... I'm weird.  But I don't mind casting my line and feeling for bites and reeling it in.  Not sure I could eat our catch either.  Dressing them would be Steven's job too... so essentially, fishing is for Steven and not me.  He can bring me the finished product and I can fry it up in a pan for him.  LOL!  Maybe I could wrap it in a foil pouch and cook it over the fire... LOL!  So, I hope you enjoy yourself.  I like the boat ride.  That's pretty cool!  Steven and I went on a motor boat ride at Longview Lake a couple of years ago.  He even let me drive it!  LOL!  That was cool!  Well, anyway... you GO ON with your bad self with that 30 minutes on the treadmill!  See?  It gets easier with time.  We really DO have to listen to our bodies... and our bodies will let us know when enough is enough.  So you keep it up!  Whatever you're doing is helping YOU.  And that's what matters, right? 

Marge,
I think you're finally to the point that I was when I decided that it was time to get back on the plan.  It's time to move forward and never look back.  That's how I was back 9 weeks ago.  Believe me... YOU WILL FEEL BETTER... you just have to DO IT!  Just do it!  One meal at a time... one day at a time... and before long, you'll have many days under your belt... and you'll get that feeling back... and when you finally DO get that feeling (and I know you know the feeling I'm talking of), you'll not want ANYTHING to take it away from you!  You'll get butt-kickin' mad at anyone who tries to offer you anything off plan.  And this time around... you will remember how hard it was for you to get to that point and you won't let anyone/anything sway you from your straight and narrow path.  The first few weeks were the scariest for me... because I doubted myself and my resolve... but with each day that kept adding up, my resolve got stronger and stronger.  Can you believe how well I was yesterday?  I can't believe it myself... I slipped a little... but nothing like what it could have been... and of all things... on corn?  (Steven still can't understand how I'm allowed potatoes and not corn.)  But the S'mores were a bit uncalled for... but I was completely POP the entire weekend while I was camping with the exception of the late supper on Thursday.  And considering the fact that Steven and I have eaten almost an entire package of a 6-pack of Hershey bars in the past... 2 S'mores was really nothing.  And I'm not feeling guilty at all.  I almost let it give me permission to go out and eat today, but Steven nipped that in the bud, God love 'im.  I need to tell him that he saved me when he calls me again.  I never told him of the emotional battle that I struggled with just before he left for KC and the part he played in keeping me from making a big mistake.  I think he KNEW that I was maybe wanting to go out... which may be why he kept bringing up my OP foods that he would be willing to eat too.  So you can do this, Marge... and right now is the time to just dive in and do it.  I didn't get to take that hike with Steven... not because I didn't feel physically ABLE to... it's because of the bugs and the rain.  So we'll shoot for Turkey Run in the Fall.  I will be sending good vibes your way for your resolve to stick... YOU CAN DO THIS! 

Well, folks... I'm gonna sign off for now.  It's been a nice weekend... Steven and I had a blast, despite the rain yesterday.  That sort of dampered things somewhat, but the meal more than made up for it.  I suppose that if it had been a nice day, we would have eaten FAR worse... as it was, I was FORCED to eat POP!  LOL!  I couldn't think of anything better to be forced upon me, could you? 

Have a great evening all!
Shelley

Good morning!

Well, it's time to get back on my regular schedule.  No more sleeping in.  No more slacking on my cardio.  I had a small gain over the weekend, but it could have been worse... and it's nothing that I can't handle.  The main thing is... I had control over what I ate... and I knew when was enough.  And now... I know what to do to get that water gain off.  That's all it is... water gain... not real fat gain.  So, today, I blow my Bean back up (we had to deflate it to fit everything into the car) and I will do my cardio when I get home from work.  Not what I really like to do... but I have to do it then.  Well, after I get back from Springfield with my mom.  She has her doctor appointment today.  I hope she quickly gets in and out today.  The last time, we waiting in the waiting room for 45 minutes AFTER her appointment time (and we were about 15 minutes early... so total of an hour wait) before they actually called her back.  SO frustrating. 

So, we have patients this morning and as soon as we're finished, I will shoot over to the nursing home and ride over to Springfield with Mom. 

The temps are expected to get hot again... hopefully not as hot as what we had two weeks ago.  They say mid-80's for today.  That's OK, as long as the humidity is low... but even that is supposed to come back by the end of the week.  So... here we go again!  My last power bill was only $77 though... and I feel like I earned that one!  Right now, it's cool and comfortable in the house... I hope I can keep it that way!  LOL!  We'll see! 

Well, I need to probably go and check on my breakfast... it's cooking as I type this.  I slept a little later than I wanted to... but it felt good... except, I missed my snuggle-buddy... I hope he slept well last night, poor guy... that drive always wears him out. 

I'll talk to y'all later!

Shelley